Finding calm in the middle

The Aspen tree is a perfect example of positive change. Each year as the tree prepares for winter dormancy, its leaves turn a dazzling display of different shades of gold, red, orange and purple. The tree itself is stressed enough to drop its leaves so that it can direct its growth from the inside and emerge bigger and stronger in the spring.

“I’m in the process of positive changes.”

That affirmation from the beautiful and inspirational Louise Hay has been in my head constantly these past few weeks. Like many others, I’ve been experiencing a lot of change that has hit all at once. At times, that change feels like more than I can handle. And during these times of extreme change, it’s hard to maintain a positive attitude. In fact, it’s downright impossible some days.

When faced with extreme changes, affirmations can be a saving grace. Some people love and resonate with affirmations; others do not. I’ve had mixed results with them over the years but am reminded of their importance as I navigate these hard changes. Affirmations are starting points–they are designed to wake you up and help you take notice of where you are now and where you are headed. They serve as a reminder of the way life can be if you’ll only take notice and adjust your thinking.

The affirmation above does just that. When I start to feel stressed, angry, tired or when I simply can’t cope, that affirmation pops into my head. It helps me remember that all of life’s changes are indeed positive. Sure, my first reaction may be to deny it, mock it, or decry it, but affirmations work in subtle ways. When I notice I’m mocking the affirmation or not believing it, I quiet my mind, repeat it several times and then forget it. It’s enough of a pause in my conscious thoughts to remind me that the world is conspiring in my favor. It slaps me upside the head as if to say, “You may not see it now, but all of these changes will work out to your benefit. Be mindful of how you respond to these changes.”

Ultimately, change is good. Remember that and affirm it. You might not believe it or be conscious of it in this moment, but change is positive. Change is growth. With growth comes new opportunities, so seize change and allow it. Remind yourself over and over that you will come out in a much better place even if you can’t see it right now.

Two easy ways to use affirmations:

1. Take a scheduled time each day to repeat a few affirmations quietly. Relax your body, focus your mind, tell yourself that for the next several minutes you will suspend judgment and allow yourself to believe the words you’re about to say. Say them  in your mind, say them out loud, or shout them to the universe if you feel inspired. Spend just a few moments doing this at a time that works for you.
2. Throughout the day when you catch yourself feeling on edge, anxious or stressed, stop what you’re doing, close your eyes for a moment and repeat an affirmation that reminds you of where you want to be. Pick words that address how you’re feeling and reframe those emotions to more positive ones. Just saying this internally a few times can help adjust your thinking and emotions on a small scale. Sometimes all you need is a little push in a new and different direction to help reduce your stress and remind you of how great you are.

 

Want to change the world? Start with a little trust

The world seems to be suffering from a lack of trust. You don’t need to look far to see this mistrust. It’s shows up in political commercials, acts of terrorism, entertainment and even religion. Mistrust disguises itself as the desire to change the world for the better. But to change the world for the better, we need to approach trust from another perspective: trust in our own selves first.

So how do you learn to trust in yourself let alone others? Do you start with trust and build upon it or is it something that must be earned incrementally? The easiest way is to start with where you are right now.

Affirming yourself

Trust and change come from self-affirmation. Affirming yourself is simply the acceptance of your entire self: the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful. Affirmation takes into account that no one else in the universe is you. Your thoughts, emotions, beliefs, strengths and weaknesses belong to no one else and realizing this, you can turn all of those attributes into the building blocks for a better world.

Self-affirmation doesn’t mean that you can’t actively wish to change some things about yourself. We all hold ideal versions of ourselves; it’s a part of our natural heritage. But self-acceptance acknowledges both the good and bad within and releases the resistance to not being there yet.

For example, I have a clear image of my ideal “professional writer” self. That self is successful, well received and well compensated. I’m certainly not there… yet. My writing needs work; my presentation skills need developing; my audience needs building. Still, I acknowledge those shortcomings and continue working toward my ideal self. In affirming myself where I am, I allow the creative universe to deliver new and exciting things to me, even if they don’t look exactly as I planned.

Start within and move out

I can hear the objections now: “That all sounds nice and pretty on paper, but I already trust myself, it’s others that I don’t!” you object. In conscious creation terms, it’s important to remember that the physical world is a reflection of your own beliefs, feelings and thoughts. Everything you experience first existed as a thought, an expectation of how reality should be. So when you experience something you don’t like or want, you must first look inward to discover the beliefs behind the experience.

As you begin to trust yourself, when you affirm yourself and your being, you automatically help others. Your energy is stabilized and clear. You don’t get in your own way by constantly second-guessing your decisions and your actions. Accepting “where you are” allows you to get to “where you want to be” with less baggage and less psychic weight.

Accepting yourself (and others) for what they are

When you hold no resistance between yourself and your ideal self, you can experience the same in others. It’s easier to understand this when you think of your mate or your pets. You may see the greatness in these individuals and creatures yet realize there are times when they don’t measure up to that greatness. However, your love transcends this gap and allows you to accept them as they are. Having that same loving regard for yourself opens you up to seeing the same in others whom you might normally mistrust.

Trust in yourself also means trusting those nudges your inner self gives you every day. Those impulses are messages from your inner (or higher) self, urging you to action that automatically benefits you and the rest of the world. Struggling against those natural urges creates more resistance and cuts you off from energy that can indeed change the world. Start with yourself, affirm your being and honor your spirit. The world will thank you.